Swimming in Her Honor: A Grandmother’s Support Lives On

“Another Chinese New Year dinner is in full swing. Sitting around our big red round table with a hot pot, Peking duck, spring roll, and many delicious foods, I often gaze across the table at the empty chair we set for my dear Grandma, who passed away from lymphoma in 2022.” – An excerpt from Ethan Qian-Tsuchida's Giving Page, which he set up in memory of his late grandmother

Over a decade ago, it was Ethan’s grandmother, Qing Ling Dai, who first brought him to a local swim club after school at just six years old. When she saw how much he enjoyed being in the water, she encouraged him to pursue competitive swimming and continued to support him as he grew in the sport, becoming his biggest champion and cheering him on at his swim meets.

At age 78, Qing Ling Dai was diagnosed with lymphoma and began treatment at Dana-Farber Cancer Institute. During her treatment, attending races became harder. Some days, leaving home wasn’t always possible. Still, she refused to miss these moments and stayed connected by supporting Ethan’s races virtually, marking the events on her calendar and setting alarms to watch them live.

When Qing Ling Dai passed away in 2022 after 10 months of treatment, Ethan reflected on her strength and the role she played in encouraging him over the years. Watching her face cancer with such courage left a lasting impression on him, and in an effort to honor her memory and bring awareness to blood cancers, he decided to take action.

Ethan created a giving page, taking the opportunity to remember his grandmother while helping support research and care for others facing blood cancers.

“I am so glad my swimming brought her joy to the last leg of her beautiful life journey. I created the Giving Page to support Dana-Farber researchers in finding more effective treatments for other loving grandmas like mine.”

Ethan Qian-Tsuchida

For Ethan, it began as a way to recognize the impact Qing Ling Dai had on his life and the support she continued to show him, even throughout her treatment. What it has become is a means for friends, family, teammates, and community members to rally around her story, turning remembrance into something that continues to make a difference in the lives of patients at Dana-Farber and beyond.

With his giving page, Ethan ensures that the encouragement from his grandmother extends beyond him to others facing cancer, and continues to impact cancer research and patient care in a meaningful way. And while Qing Ling Dai’s absence is deeply felt at family celebrations, her presence remains strong in the memories and passions she nurtured—especially in Ethan’s love for swimming.

To close, below is a heartfelt poem written by Ethan and recited at his grandmother’s burial, which reflects his deep love and admiration for the way she lived her life.

The Day of a Life

“Each life is like a day, every one of them unique and having their own quirks which can be seen with ease if you look closely enough. But we don’t like to stare, we don’t like to slow down. Especially not here in Boston. Here, it’s busy to this and busy to that. However, today is a different day, today we must slow down and we must stare. Not in a disapproving way as a teacher would to the class clown, but in a loving manner, one where we only wish to know more, to have spent more time, to see as it truly was.

I see every nook and cranny about Grandma. The Grandma. My Grandma. I feel her calmness, her hand on my shoulder, her loving and confident heart. I still taste the food she cooked, the shrimp drowned in red sauce, the pasta and peas sitting in the same red sauce, (wow that was some nice sauce), the ox-tail soup the family cooks with tradition. I find her scent tickling my nose from time to time, from the light breeze coming from out the window, and from the faint odor of last night’s dinner. I hear the clacking of the mahjong pieces falling onto the floor and the laughter coming with it.

I admire Grandma, for how can she be so very content? Never angry with a flame, never frustrated with clenched fists, never panicked with dripping sweat, never even bored, a feeling I thought went along with existing. I may never understand how she did it, but I hope, by slowing down and staring, I can at least have a glimpse at a day of her life.”

Join people like Ethan and support Dana-Farber Cancer Institute’s lifesaving mission to provide compassionate patient care and groundbreaking cancer research for children and adults.

Since 1948, the generosity of millions of people has helped the Jimmy Fund save countless lives and reduce the burden of cancer for patients and families worldwide through community-based fundraising events and other programs that solely and directly benefit Dana-Farber. Learn more about how you can get involved at JimmyFund.org, and follow the Jimmy Fund on Facebook, X (formerly Twitter), and Instagram: @TheJimmyFund.